And shouted: “Stop the presses! Often individuals have sex! And quite often they have even intercourse with individuals they’re perhaps perhaps perhaps not married to! ”
Snarkiness aside, he previously a true point: if cheating is really so typical (research places it at 40 to 76 % of marriages), exactly why are we so amazed and scandalized by it? Why don’t we talk more realistically about how exactly to prevent it, or to even test out the indisputable fact that perhaps there may be a way because of it become safe?
Some married friends of mine have a policy that is no-tell. They’ve been basically monogamous but have an “if you cheat, please don’t tell me” guideline. Many of these buddies experienced affairs they intend on using with their graves. Other partners we understand have experienced flings after which confessed without imploding their marriages. The type of that did split, it absolutely was typically simply because they had lost touch with one another, and affairs had been one outcome.
“Infidelity does not destroy a relationship, ” a therapist explained. “Indifference does. ”
Needless to say, infidelity can result in indifference, from your partner because it distracts you.
That’s why, green light or no, extramarital flirting can be stupid, unpredictable and cruel.